At least we lost an hour tonight! Less time to make a fool of myself
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
I guess when the asshole said “I really miss you and want to get back together” he actually meant “I’m banging a Hooters girl behind your back.”
I hope she gives him gonorhea
Randomize