now i know why i became what i already was.
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
No need to call an exterminator, the ants overdosed on the leftover lines on the counter.
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
BING! You are now free to move about my panties. He just left for work.
after you got high, you started to make guac with your bare hands and said: "there's soda bubbles in my legs"
...and if you can get the necessary ingredients to make the Buffalo Chicken Melt, I will latch forever at your Teat of Justice.
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