Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
Randomize
