the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
all i remember thinking as i was puking my intestines out is : wow.. this toilet does look like it's from the future.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
Robbie told me you spent 10 mins discussing the curl in his hair and that you said "with that curl in your hair, you'll go far"
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
My mom found me this morning passed out, face down on my dinning room floor
That must have been one awkward situation haha
Well I woke up in my bed.... I don't remember her finding me
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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