You'd be proud of me. They tried to give me bread to sober up, but I told them no, im on a diet.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just going to say , cocktail races are not for a Wednesday night maybe not even a Friday type of deal
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
You were laying next to me in bed at 4:30 a.m. I asked if you were drunk and you said you weren't drunk you were buzzed like a bumblebee. Then kept rambling on about having to call out of work.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
Unexpected pro of the hostel though: literally down the street from Coors Field. I could literally fart on the building in five minutes.
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