Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?