You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
It took me 40.8 seconds to take a dump at her house, I know because I timed myself.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
You know you're a heffer when you discover chocolate frosting on your smoking apparatus
Apparently 24 hr fitness frowns upon the ingestion of psychedelics on its premises, don't see that in the sign up contract.
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
drunk boyfriend and drunk me are NOT meant for each other
Randomize
