Is there a reason "Call me when you're legal" is written on my arm? I'm 22..
my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
I woke up to 'call me' written in red lipstick on my chest. Thats the hottest/sluttiest thing ever. I win at LIFE!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this girl with a french braid down the center of her head won't stop talking about the benefits of the free market. i'm hungover, bloated and haven't slept for 4 days. shut up french braid girl, shut up.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Hannah wants to know if she cant borrow your stats notes because she threw up on hers.
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
Randomize