What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
dressing as green man for st patrick's day = free drinks all night long
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
Come back. She's looking through naked pics of his exes on his phone and questioning him about them and I'm too drunk to walk away.
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
Can you bring home an IV stand and an empty bag so I can direct inject coffee for work tomorrow morning?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
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