Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
the lady next to me just sniffed my hair, smiled, and then fell asleep. I almost started crying from that kind of creepiness
don't cry, we can learn from her
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I told her I was going to sleep early last night. I probably should not have sent that snapchat of us playing beer pong.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
Hey do you care to explain why there are 3 empty pickle jars next to me when I woke up or do I even wanna know?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
