I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I think I just shit out all my problems.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
