so explain again why im purple
no
My Higher Power is John Stamos
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
living well may be the best revenge, but it doesn't hurt that my exhusband is now dating a BEAST.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just gift wrapped bread.
she likes to give head while listening to britney spears, getting blown by a girl with headphones on is a nice level of separation
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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