why is it that everytime a half black man enters something boring, it suddenly becomes sexy to people? golf? the presidency?
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
Using Dr. Seuss quotes to ask me how badly I want your penis is not appropriate.
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
just got back. in my inebriated state i broke an ugly lamp and was sent to the store (still drunk) to get a new one. just spent last half hour in isle 3 of dollar general surounded by more ugly lamps and trying not to throw up on each and every single one.
Randomize