your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
haha it's ok, I asked people. I was like "I'm high and lost" and the dude just said "That's my life. Love it."
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
Randomize
