yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you missed it. This guy in the liquor store knocked over a whole display of 5 hour energy with his face.
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
either i huffed spraypaint or ate out that makeup artist. you decide.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I just had sex on a roof
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
Being forward is somethimes a problems. Like in sexual deity Kong.
I think you’re losing coherence.
I am
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize