That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I'm puking to John Mayor, save me. Or at least change it to somethong beyyt
No matter what I do you still love me. It's like loving a retarded kid. A retarded kid that keeps trying to sleep with you.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
Apparently I thanked the paramedics over and over again for saving the "happy new year" beads that I was wearing
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
Randomize
