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• (858): View more from California

  Tonight's Jeopardy categories were "Star Trek, Action Figures, Dinner For One, In Need of a Date, Still Living With Mom & Dad, You Have No Life." Beginning to think my life is the Truman Show.

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• (540): View more from Virginia

  so i woke up.. still drunk and discovered my roommate in the living room passed out dick-in-hand watching porn..

  (1-540): View more from Virginia

  What did u do?

  (540): View more from Virginia

  turned the porn up and opened the windows so everybody goin to class could see him..

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.

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  27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst

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• (765): View more from Indiana

  I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.

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• (952): View more from Minnesota

  i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.

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• (801): View more from Utah

  After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.

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• (207): View more from Maine

  Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.

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• (210): View more from Texas

  My bathroom smells like artichokes and absinthe. I am naming a perfume after you and using the money to buy new towels.

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  These 21 People Are Related To Famous Celebrities

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.

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• (289): View more from Ontario

  "you can only have my number if you answer all the questions on this trivial pursuit card correctly"

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  He has blue eyes of sex and i am powerless against them

  (1-519): View more from Ontario

  Doesn't tell me where my computer chair went but good to know

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• (319): View more from Iowa

  Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?

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• (253): View more from Washington

  She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"

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• (772): View more from Florida

  I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.

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