Texts From Last Night

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  (503): View more from Oregon

  ...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...

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  (503): ...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home... http://tfl.nu/g51m
  Replies (7) Good night (613) Bad night (1121)
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  (440): View more from Ohio

  so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce

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  (440): so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce http://tfl.nu/bsub
  Replies (22) Good night (3070) Bad night (1253)
• Favorite

  (778): View more from British Columbia

  The beer is more important than you right now.

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  (778): The beer is more important than you right now. http://tfl.nu/guwa
  Replies (8) Good night (3641) Bad night (1406)
• Favorite

  (201): View more from New Jersey

  You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.

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  (201): You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality. http://tfl.nu/6ws6
  Replies (26) Good night (1528) Bad night (3997)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?

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  (207): we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet? http://tfl.nu/uydl
  Replies (9) Good night (6254) Bad night (982)
• Favorite

  (786): View more from Florida

  I miss vodka workout Fridays

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  (786): I miss vodka workout Fridays http://tfl.nu/gp5l
  Replies (5) Good night (2903) Bad night (991)
• Favorite

  (779): View more from Illinois

  should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?

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  (779): should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark? http://tfl.nu/0hyg
  Replies (8) Good night (3661) Bad night (1321)
• Favorite

  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line

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  (401): Just croosed over that too drunk for chemistry class line http://tfl.nu/kpx6
  Replies (12) Good night (2910) Bad night (917)
• Favorite

  (919): View more from North Carolina

  Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?

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  (919): Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again? http://tfl.nu/p959
  Replies (14) Good night (4733) Bad night (1191)
• Favorite

  (360): View more from Washington

  I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.

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  (360): I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid. http://tfl.nu/iiw2
  Replies (5) Good night (1679) Bad night (563)
• Favorite

  (562): View more from California

  I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas

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  (562): I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas http://tfl.nu/zf6g
  Replies (7) Good night (893) Bad night (344)
• Favorite

  (410): View more from Maryland

  I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.

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  (410): I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now. http://tfl.nu/a4rz
  Replies (7) Good night (1267) Bad night (364)
• Favorite

  (864): View more from South Carolina

  I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.

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  (864): I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something. http://tfl.nu/s8xu
  Replies (6) Good night (870) Bad night (421)
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.

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  (612): I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises. http://tfl.nu/ns4w
  Replies (2) Good night (502) Bad night (319)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL

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  (618): ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL http://tfl.nu/3dit
  Replies (3) Good night (691) Bad night (351)

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