yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
No stitches, just platelets and will power
When I'm drunk and can't pee, I sing my abc's in my head and try to pee before I get to pee. Last night I forgot to do it in my head
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
bonus check + party bus = big hot mess
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize