summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
I don't know anybody that can get the cops to drive them back to the bar after being pulled out of a tree
it happenes
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
