Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
Randomize
