What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
True love is taking a shit with the one you love in the bathroom with you.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Wow, being the totally hot and slutty looking 30 year old lady on the dance floor does NOT necessarily mean that she has skills in bed.
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Randomize
