I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
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So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
I would use the term shit faced but I'm too polite for that
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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