this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
It's just like the Real World with babies
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
He went out to smoke and when he came back I was still in the same spot naked and unable to breathe.
All I could say was, "ladies and gentlemen, THIS is why I drive 30 mins"
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If anybody had to puke on my shoes, I'm glad it was you.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize