I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
If I die and they 'assume' it's natural causes, just go with it.
He told me i had to sleep under his bed. He said it would be my castle.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Randomize
