Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
You know you've found a good drug dealer when he's willing to overnight mail to you in another state...
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
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