Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Well who could blame her. I would run away from me if I could.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
I don't think I can get drunk, high or horny enough to even consider that
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize