he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
i used baking grease as lip gloss
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moms kinda upset I threw up in grandmas bedroom. I think ill stay in tonight.
I've decided the third guy that I slept with is who I lost my virginity to...
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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