So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
It was as if you forgot how to speak normally. All of your words came out either backwards or in song form
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
She greeted me with a new giants jersey and an opening day blowjob. this is true love.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
I'll have to text you later. Trying to have civilized conversations with the boyfriends parents when I'm 100% aware I just blew their son in the bathroom 5 mins ago. Stay tuned.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
OH MY GOD REMEMBER ALL THAT I LOVE NEW YORK I DVRED BECAUSE I JUST DID
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
He is 6'5, went to a Christian school and he's a violinist....I'm going to fuck the jesus right out of him.
I am a unicorn in a field of flowers, you asshole.
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