This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
How do I tell her I need the lights out when I'm getting head because she and my mom share a perm color
I can't feel my clothes. I'm convinced I'm naked
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
I think there is a legit party going on the place we thought was AA
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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