What are we going to do tonight?
What we try to do every night. Take over the world
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
He just said he was the Jesus of alcoholics.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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