I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
My life has hit rock bottom, I'm watching a movie on lifetime about retarded people falling in love. And I'm jealous of their relationship.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Just read my long term horoscope. I'm not gonna get laid for another 2 years.
Well if my looks don't work with her I'll eat the 50 nuggets to impress her fat roommate.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I know how to say Yes, No, and Your Mother's Vagina. So almost fluent.
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
The hat, the beard, the hard posing - like who does he think he is?
A bag of dicks
That's dating life
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