Midget sex pt 2 tonight
dude my little brother busts into my room last night and yells did you know that grandma is hiding scrambled eggs between her legs
I want to leave work and go home and eat Five Guys and masturbate
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
Everyone agrees they like your mother better drunk
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
I went to her house she had a kid pool in her living room watching the vacation channel drinking rum out of the bottle saying" life is what you make it. Mines a vacation!!!"
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
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