haha omg you stole $185 from a passed out drunk indian on your porch and called the ambulance??
savin' lives aint cheap
im over her. I got weed and youtube. everything i could ever ask for.
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
I woke up at 6 on his trampoline wearing only a parka.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
I mean, that's eating your cake and fucking it too.
I think this shark week should consist of getting drunk enough to actually go hunt sharks ourselves.
Captain and coke. And it's not drinking alone cuz i have a dog
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
lol hangovers are for mortals.