So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
you were mass sexting so we took your phone away
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Just got a blowjob on the pier where my great-grandfather entered America.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I don't know what she looks like but I'm pretty sure she has a pussy.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
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