he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
In the middle of having sex she stopped, said "guess what, it's clitoris awareness week" and then continued fucking me
Pretend you're in a taco. That always helps me sleep.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize