The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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