Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I should stop using "Braveheart would do it" as a basis for decision making...
I had sex upstairs in my parents house, and my mom texted me and said "those raccoons are out of control in the walls."
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Tell me I'm drunk and you have to come get me. It's usually true. They'll believe you.
hey can you come unlock the basement door? I'm trapped in here.
no I can't, you're a safety hazard. but, there's a beer keg down there somewhere. we don't have cups, but help yourself.
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