we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
I just bought the big bottle of Patron. It looks small. What have I done with my life?
Succeeded.
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
surprisingly enough, it isn't that uncomfortable to have sex with a heart monitor on
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
It must be love. I'm deleting my porn for him.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
Randomize
