We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
Sorry for making you give strangers a ride for hits of acid.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
He literally said I should watch game of thrones while I was blowing him like is this the conversation you want to be having right now
I slept with a Brazillian Man, That's why I'm Watching The World Cup
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
