I fell asleep on the toilet again last night...
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
"reccomended dose" hasn't been in my vocabulary for quite some time.
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Yeah we invited her back for chicken nugget sandwiches
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
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