I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
i decided i'll just settle for a gay guy who can manage to fuck me like the straight guys do. but here i go again, talking about my dream man.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Randomize
