Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
When the cops come you probably shouldn't be poking cars with a stick.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I ordered a million chicken go wraps and they gave me five. Even when im drunk I can count to a million and know its not five. They fucked me.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
