"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
please tell me we weren't that bad as freshmen
i can't, we're worse now
The second time he came it projectile shot in my ear
We were in a spooning position and it shot all the way up. He was like sorry. Physics.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
Getting dressed and listening to the song Buffalo Bill danced to in Silence of the Lambs. I'm a perfect psych major.
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
If you don't fuck me hard, rough, and senseless the minute we're alone in your room, I'm returning you to the boyfriend store
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
I don't know what it is about this quarantine, but I have never written this much smutty fanfic in my life and I am loving it!
Randomize
