Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he found you with your pants down, trying to straddle the urinal. no one should have to see their sister like that. ever.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
i believe in u and ur pee
don't worry dude i have your phone, text me when youre gonna come get it
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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