Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
A 12 year old Canadian kid said I was a pussy for only buying a 28-pack. I fit in better in this country.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
29 People Confess The Worst Example Of Dirty Talk They’ve Ever Heard
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
He won't sleep with me again until I commit...
Run. There is other dick in the sea, less clingy dick.
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
21 Women Compare Anal and Vaginal Sex
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.