hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Remember, I smoked so you wouldn't have to. I'm like the Jesus of Marijuana.
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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