Her tattoo has the intellectual profundity of snakes on a plane except you can't laugh.
i just realized i have an entire drawer dedicated to the clothes of guys ive shacked with...
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
23 People Noticed Deal Breakers in Their Partner A Little Too Late
Can you pinpoint the moment you decided it was acceptable to trade blow jobs for beers or was it a gradual slide?
Are we going out tonight?
My conscience says no but my vag says yes
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
23 Millennials Confess The Things They Wish They Weren’t Attracted To
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
It's so Britney 2007, you know?