Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I'm stoned at 1030am, watching Maury with my exboyfriend. I need to make better choices with my life.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Woke up this morning with an extra $35 and someone else's ATM receipt. How much did I drink last night?
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
If you can throw 105 mph it’s mandatory that you’re hung.
I’m lazy so obviously looking like a rotisserie chicken is my favourite position
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