Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
Everyone's going out for thirsty Thursday and I'm just like. Cool. Enjoy yourself. I'm gonna eat an entire pizza and watch King of Queens reruns.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
Randomize
