Ben affleck wants to be a US senator. Just thought you would puke with me
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
I keep having to talk dad out of putting tequila in the milkshakes.
He told me that he wanted to break up with his girl friend but only after we had sex, only for him to make sure I'm worth it..
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
Oh my lord it is too early in the morning to be that horny freak
my vagina doesn't wear a watch
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
my mom just came into my room and handed me a news paper article about women on the verge of a drinking problem... i can already tell its not about to be sunday funday
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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