I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I lost half a toenail and didn't realize it. Bloody shoe shoulda been a clue.
I always make inappropriate sexual decisions during the holidays
We were looking everywhere for you and I finally found you in the closet talking to a build a bear.. So I gave you and myself another drink
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
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