But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
I'm so high I just tried to eat a hair tie thinking it was one of my pretzels.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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